How do you time Portal speed runs?

Question

Now that I finished the game I wanted to start training for a speed run but I'm not sure how I can time it.

Is there a built-in function I have to activate?

Is it just timed "manually"? If yes do the cutscenes count or not? And how can you time it so precisely, for example this guy (for portal 1 though) has it down to the millisecond.

Answer

"Down to the millisecond" may be a touch disingenuous; the time 0.567 is about 17/30, or 17 frames assuming the video is 30 fps, the default rate to export frames from a Source engine demo (see here). The final time he calculated (in seconds) would then be the number of frames he got from the startmovie command divided by 30.

As far as how speed runs are "officially" timed, the most "official" (notice the quotes) body I know for speed-runs would be the Speed Demos Archive, who maintain a decent amount of runs across various platforms. They have an FAQ about how to time runs, which may also play a role in how he figured his time (their rules say from the start of player control to the end).

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In Kingdom of Loathing, what does a 'fast ascension' entail?

Question

I stopped playing KoL a while back, but I still remember people making outrageous claims of ascending in under 3 days or something of the sort, maybe even less. How is that even possible?

Answer

From what I remember:

(optional):Buying Mr. Store items / donating (they get delivered through Ronin, I believe) Softcore Withdrawals of only the most adventurers / stomach/drunkenness/spleen hit (so the Oxygenarian, Boozetefarian, and Teetotaler rewards)

It requires a lot of meat (as the relevant items are hard to farm on your own) and dedication.

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